Roshni Mehrotra – smilewithroshni.com

We all love our dear ones, yet we happen to take them for granted and may fail to notice or understand what they must be going through…taking it as a part of life or person’s nature. Just because we are not in that situation, going through the stress what other may be going through either not being able to relate to it or comparing with your lows and thinking if you managed (you may even happen to boast about it ) so would they and, neglect them. Or, you may happen to advice them too much. But this attitude can sometimes make us regret later..No one thinks their dear ones can ever suicide, but yet they often do. So, before it’s too late become aware of the following: RISK FACTORS People who die by suicide are frequently experiencing undiagnosed, undertreated, or untreated depression. A number of other things may also put a person at risk of suicide, including: A family history of suicide. Substance abuse. Drugs and alcohol can result in mental highs and lows that exacerbate suicidal thoughts. Intoxication. More than one in three people who die from suicide are found to be under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Access to firearms. A serious or chronic medical illness. A history of trauma or abuse. Prolonged stress. Isolation. A recent tragedy or loss. Agitation and sleep deprivation. WARNING SIGNS Recognizing the signs of suicide is of utmost importance in order to provide timely help and support to individuals who may be at risk. If you notice these signs, take them seriously. SUICIDAL THOUGHTS OR COMMENTS Threats or comments about killing themselves, also known as suicidal ideation, which may seem to you just an outburst of anger or negative attitude can become more overt and dangerous. Some examples of such thoughts are: “Life isn’t worth living” “ I wish I was not here in this world” “ My family will be better off without me” “ You’ll be sorry when I’m gone” “ Life is unbearable” “ I won’t be around to deal with that” “ I will soon be out of your way” “ You’ll no more have any trouble from me” “ I wish I were dead” “ I have a plan to kill myself” “ Next time I’ll ensure I have taken the right amount of pills” BEHAVIOURAL SIGNS Increased alcohol and drug use Aggressive behavior Social withdrawal from friends, family and the community Dramatic mood swings Talking, writing or thinking about death Impulsive or reckless behavior Putting their affairs in order and giving away their possession Saying goodbye to friends and family Mood shifts from despair to calm Planning, possibly by looking around to buy, steal or borrow the tools they need to commit suicide, such as a firearm , rope or prescription medication Extremely depressed Not eating, sleeping or bathing Getting affairs in order (Paying off debts, changing will etc) SUICIDE PREVENTION – WHAT CAN YOU DO TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE Life’s journey can lead us through dark patches, but with understanding and compassion, we can be a source of support. Here are practical strategies to lend a helping hand: ACTIVE LISTENING Often when someone express their problem or pain to us or we notice some psychological outburst, we end up advicing the person. Do not Advice, Accuse, Shout or be Sarcastic! Just “Listen” to them seriously. Understand. Provide a non-judgmental and empathetic ear. Let them express their feelings and thoughts without interruption. For example, hold their hand or give them a warm hug and say “I’m here for you. Take your time, and when you’re ready, share your thoughts. I’m here to listen without judgment.” STAY CALM Maintain a calm demeanor during discussions. Avoid expressing shock or judgment, which could make them feel misunderstood. You can rather say with genuineness “I really appreciate your honesty in sharing your feelings. I’m here to support you, and we can navigate through this together.” SHARE CONCERN Show genuine care and let them know you’ve noticed their struggles. For example, you can say I’ve noticed that you seem really down lately (or you often talk about killing yourself). I care about you, and I’m worried. Can we talk about what’s going on?” ASK DIRECT QUESTIONS Gently inquire about their thoughts, ensuring clarity about their intentions and plans. This can guide further action. “I’m really sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way. Can you tell me if you’ve had thoughts of hurting yourself, and if so, do you have a plan?” ENCOURAGE PROFESSIONAL HELP You must suggest them to seek support from mental health professionals. Help them understand that might help them transform the way they feel and find solutions to their problems. You may say “Speaking to a mental health professional can make a big difference. I can help you find someone if you’re comfortable with that.” STAY CONNECTED Regularly check in on them. A simple message or call can make a significant difference in their feelings of isolation. Even if they say or act to be ok, let them know you are there. For example you can say “I’ll be checking in on you regularly. Even if you don’t feel like talking, I would just want to be there with you” REMOVE LETHAL ITEMS You must limit their access to lethal items such as firearms, knives, rope or medications, reducing the risk of impulsive actions. INVOLVE SUPPORT NETWORKS Encourage them to reach out to friends, family, or a support group. Sharing the burden can make the struggle more manageable. You may tell them “I’m here to support you, and so are your friends and family. They care about you and want to help too.” Create A Safety Plan: Work together to establish a plan outlining coping mechanisms, emergency contacts, and steps to follow during crises. You may say “Let’s work together on a plan. What are some activities or people that usually help you feel better? We can include them in your safety plan.” DON’T PROMISE SECRECY While respecting their privacy, make it clear that safety concerns may require involving others, like friends, family, or professionals. You may say “I want to respect your privacy, but if I’m really concerned for your safety, I might need to involve someone else who can help. Let’s talk about who that might be.” TAKE INITIATIVE AND VOICE YOUR CONCERN If someone post suicidal thoughts or shows such behavioural signs on twitter, Facebook or any other platform of social media, please ACT and inform some trustworthy adult (do not think you are betraying the person as the person is in disturbed state of mind, remember you are trying to help the one you care for). POINT TO REMEMBER Be careful. Sometimes it may seem they are fine and you may assume that things will get better with time. Please keep in mind that they can be very unpredictable and can impulsively harm themselves. So make sure you seek professional help as Mental health professionals are trained to help a person understand their feelings and can improve mental wellness and resiliency. FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS How do I differentiate between normal teenage mood swings and signs of suicide?It can be challenging to differentiate between normal teenage mood swings and signs of suicide. However, if the changes in behavior are persistent, extreme, and accompanied by other warning signs mentioned in this blog post, it is crucial to seek professional help and support. What should I do if someone denies having suicidal thoughts but still displays concerning behaviors?If someone denies having suicidal thoughts but exhibits concerning behaviors, it is important to take their actions seriously. Encourage them to seek professional help and be supportive and understanding in their recovery journey. Are there any warning signs specific to different age groups?While the warning signs mentioned in this blog post apply to various age groups, it is essential to note that certain age groups may exhibit different signs. For example, children may display increased irritability or difficulty focusing, while older adults may show signs of isolation and withdrawal. Being aware of the unique signs for different age groups can aid in early intervention. By being vigilant, informed, and supportive, we can offer assistance to those who need it the most and contribute in creating a more healthier and supportive society. Remember, it is always better to err on the side of caution and take action when in doubt. “Those who get these thoughts are not weak, but perhaps giving up…Let’s hold them and get their wounds healed…” – Roshni Mehrotra

Author: Roshni Mehrotra

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